Now that's a clear cut situation with a promise of comedy. Tell your friends!

Things you may notice on this blog:
1. a lot of late, late night posts. (it doesn't count as a new day until go you to sleep.)
2. a bunch of images that don't belong to me.
3. more cursing than a Kathy Griffin special on Bravo.

Speaking of Bravo, I really like TV. Let me rephrase that-I really like TV shows. I like them more than movies, plays, anything. I really like how complex the characters can be, and how much history can grow over a season of television. I like how there can be fully comedic themed episodes and fully dramatic themed episodes. I love it.

If you don't know about it yet, you should check out Hulu.com. It's a sick website if you like free TV.

There are a few shows I love and I feel like it will give you a pretty good sense of me as a person, so get ready for it. I'll attempt to describe them to you from a completely objective point of view.

I fucking love this show and always will and fuck you if you don't agree. My love for this show stems completely from the fact that I grew up reading comic books, specifically Marvel, and even more specifically X-Men. There's almost nothing I enjoy more than the first season of this show.

OK, so, if you don't know what the show is about it's basically a bunch of extraordinarily beautiful people that discover they have run-of-the-mill super powers and get together to try to save the world a lot. The one problem is they all happen to be absolutely terrible at doing anything right and always end up more fucked than they were when they started. This is good because we all can totally relate to that. Minus the flying part.

In all seriousness that's basically the plot to every Heroes episode. Don't get me wrong, there are a couple episodes where you find out Angela Petrelli is more evil than they told you before, and a bunch of episodes where some really cool plot twists happen, but I mean, I really do think I covered the series pretty well in that last paragraph. Also, you really don't need to watch volumes 2 and 3. Just skip from 1 to 4. Let's move on.

OK...Stop judging me from the graphic. I know there's only like three of you out there that have ever seen this show so I'll go into depth when explaining it.

Eliza Dushku kicks a lot of ass, and so does some Australian chick. Everyone's attractive, but not in the usual sense, and there's a witty Brit at the helm of the title corporation. Top this all off with the BRILLIANT Joss Whedon as the series creator and main writer and what else could you ask for? Perhaps a backup singer with ninja skills protecting a Beyoncé wannabe? Maybe a kidnapper's liaison with a past that prevents her from doing her job correctly? A wealthy woman who was murdered trying to figure out who killed her from beyond the grave? Faith from Buffy the Vampire Slayer?

Well you're in luck cause Eliza Dushku plays all of those. Literally, like I'm not joking. (not even about the ninja backup singer, although I wish to God I was.) Watch the show. It was renewed for a second season. Apparently Fox learned their lesson after "Firefly"

Last but not least is the cult favorite Arrested Development. I only recently got into this show and had watched the entire series within a matter of days. It's an absolutely perfect TV show, and I clearly have the authority to decide what perfection is.

In all seriousness I've never been so enthralled by characters, so connected to dramatic action, or so moved by a series finale.

I have nothing else to say about Arrested Development. Watch this show. Unless you hate laughing or thinking. In that case watch Legend of the Seeker instead.

Well we're not here to talk nonsense to Bob Loblaw...

Hello, and welcome to The Hungry Hungry Homo Blog. I'm Michael, I have a crunchwrap supreme in hand, a liter of diet coke and I'm gonna be using this blog to talk at you, whoever you are. I say 'at' for obvious reasons. Here's a few sentences about how this will work. Sometimes funny shit happens to me, or I have epiphanies, or I discover the meaning of life and I'm all like "I should share this." Now I can. You're welcome.

Here's a bunch of sentences about why I decided to make a blog. I gayed out a few days ago and googled Kelly Clarkson. I'll give you a minute to either laugh/judge/or gay gasp and clutch your chest in excitement (I feel those are the three given reactions at the mention of Kelly Clarkson). So I Google her and you know how search engines like to give you related searches? This popped up:

Related searches: Kelly Clarkson fat. Which, while hilarious for people like me, is terrible for Kelly Clarkson! So naturally I start thinking about myself and what would show up when you Googled my full name. Among the links to a Fordham graduate, and various school coaches there were in fact a few pages about me. My public listing on Facebook, which now makes me wary of the profile picture I chose. My old Twitter account that I made before Twitter was popular and then deleted due to lack of people to follow. My new Twitter account that I got after Twitter was discovered to follow the masses, and the most embarrassing hint to my past possible.

You see, I used to write all the time, and was obsessed with a little website of fantasy fiction stories and art. I'd spend hours on it, and decided I was determined to get my writing on it. It was a long process that required approval from moderators and other people that think they're better than you, and somehow my 14 year old poem about vampires was published on the site. I absolutely will not link you to it, but you can search it if you'd like. It's a hysterical reminder of my awkward years and I've come to accept it being out there. (by 'accept it' I clearly mean that I lost the password years and years ago or that motherfucker would have bit the dust by now and I never would have brought it up again.)

Then I decided I'd look on Google images and see if there's anything that comes up that's really a picture of me. These are the only four images of my actual person that showed up in the 6 pages I looked through:

OK...The first two...What does that say about me? I look like I A. only wear Hollister B. Abuse cats C. Play with fire. I'm completely unconvinced the third one is a picture of me on second glance. I can't figure out for the life of me whose apartment that could possibly be, nor which one of those two people I could possibly be... And in the last one I'm not wearing a shirt and I don't wanna look slutty on the Internet, you know?

So...In the midst of these discoveries I thought it best to put something out there that I'm proud to show people. Something that can balance out the useless crap. Something to give everyone a pretty good sense of who I was as a person. Welcome, unsuspecting reader, to my life.

Oh, and also if you're an employer or something, don't judge or fire me? I'm considering this a binding contract on that.